When Things Go Wrong  

Even with the best parents in the world, young people can still run into trouble. Most teenagers will experiment with alcohol. Getting it wrong is unfortunately fairly common. This does not mean they will become an alcoholic. Many young people go through a phase of heavy drinking. Very few become alcohol dependent. <BR><BR>Here are some of the problems parents face with alcohol and their teenagers and some suggested action when your teen/s:<UL><LI>goes to a party when they are not allowed<LI>is taking alcohol from your drinks cupboard<LI>becomes violent when drunk&nbsp;<LI>is very drunk and unconscious&nbsp;<LI>is vomiting continuously&nbsp;<LI>school performance is being affected by their drinking<LI>drinking is out of control </LI></UL><STRONG>Your teenager goes to a party despite you telling them they are not allowed to </STRONG><BR><BR>If your teenager is sober when they arrive home and you feel able to control your anger, discuss the situation that night. If they are drunk, or yo

Even with the best parents in the world, young people can still run into trouble. Most teenagers will experiment with alcohol. Getting it wrong is unfortunately fairly common. This does not mean they will become an alcoholic. Many young people go through a phase of heavy drinking. Very few become alcohol dependent.

Here are some of the problems parents face with alcohol and their teenagers and some suggested action when your teen/s:

• goes to a party when they are not allowed
• is taking alcohol from your drinks cupboard
• becomes violent when drunk 
• is very drunk and unconscious 
• is vomiting continuously 
• school performance is being affected by their drinking
• drinking is out of control

Your teenager goes to a party despite you telling them they are not allowed to

If your teenager is sober when they arrive home and you feel able to control your anger, discuss the situation that night. If they are drunk, or you are too tired or angry to have a reasonable discussion, wait until the morning.

Let them know how you feel about their behaviour including any worries you had for their safety. Give them a chance to explain their behaviour. Go back over the rules you agreed to and make sure there is an appropriate consequence. For example you may ground your teenager for a week, including the following weekend.

Your teenager is taking alcohol from your drinks cupboard

Deal with it as you would deal with any stealing within your family. Discuss what has happened with your son or daughter. Follow through with an appropriate consequence. For example, one parent asked her teenager to pay for the alcohol taken.

Your teenager becomes violent when drunk

You don't need to put up with violence from anyone, even family members. If you don't think you can control the situation, call someone who can come quickly. This might be a friend or the police.

Discuss the situation with your teenager when they have sobered up. Make it very clear that violence is not acceptable.  For information about 'stopping violence' programmes check help and information.

Your teenager is very drunk and unconscious

Don't leave them alone. Lie them on their side in the recovery position. Make sure they are breathing and their mouth is empty. Keep them warm. If you are unable to wake them, dial 111 for an ambulance.

Your teenager is vomiting continuously

Call 111 for an ambulance.

Your teenager's school performance is being affected by their drinking and/or drug use

Just because your teenager is having problems with their drinking doesn't mean they are an alcoholic. However, the earlier they sort things out the better. They may be drinking as a way of coping with their troubles. Talk with them about this. By listening carefully and respectfully you are more likely to find out what is worrying them. You may wish to talk things over with somebody else. Check the help and information section for some ideas about who to contact.

You feel your teenager's drinking is out of control

If after discussing things with your teenager the situation doesn't improve then it is important that you discuss your concerns with a professional. There are services available in most towns and cities. The Alcohol Helpline has the contact details for all the alcohol & drug services around New Zealand. You can call them free on 0800 787797.